Saturday Soundtrack – Brought to You by the Summer of my Sophmore Year

7 Jan

I don’t know why, but I’ve heard this song, like, six times in the last week. It’s haunting me. Even though it officially came out when I was in eighth grade, it didn’t sweep our high school until the summer of 1998. Even though I was into Bjork, No Doubt (NOT Gwen Stephani, No Doubt) and any local hardcore band I could find, I couldn’t get this song out of my head. I like this song – it’s catchy, it reminds me that living for the moment is sometimes better than worrying about what tomorrow will bring. I didn’t like a single other thing Eagle Eye Cherry put out, but I love his station on Pandora.

So here’s a throwback to 1997, Save Tonight by Eagle Eye Cherry.

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Friday Five – Hard Cover Titles I Want Right Now

6 Jan

My mom got me a Kindle for my birthday, and as much as I preach the pleasure of cracking open a new book, I’m slightly addicted to it. It’s so amazingly convienient; press a button and a book appears as if by magic! No waiting until I have time to go to the bookstore, no exchanging of actual money (because virtual money doesn’t count, right???), just good books that I want, when I want them. It’s dangerous on my pocketbook, to say the least.

Anyhoo, I stand by my claim that (eventhoughtIlovemyKindleandneverwanttobewithoutit) real books will always be better. The thrill of browsing the shelves and picking up the perfect book, like rediscovering an old friend. The sound of the spine cracking as you open it for the first time, the sound that promises unlocking adventure. I love the romance of books – their promise, their ability to take you to places you never imagined, the way they sit on your shelves so patiently while you read newer, flashier titles, knowing that you’ll love them just as much when you finally come back and read them again. I even love their smell, that’s how much I love a tactile, tangible, real-life book. To this day, one of the most romantic things A can say to me (and he often does, good man) is “how about we go to the bookstore tonight, grab a cup of coffee, and buy you a good book.”

So even with my newfound Kindle-love, there are more than a few books I would die to have right now. I’d love the Kindle version, goodness knows they’d be cheaper, but I’ve wanted these titles long enough that I’d love to have them grace my shelves in hardback. Heck, I’d take them in softcover, but nothin’ says lovin’ like a hardback book. So here, in no particular order, are the top five books I’d love to have in real-print editions right now:

1. Fragments: Poems, Intimate Notes, Letters by Marilyn Monroe, etided by Bernard Comment

2. Bossypants by Tina Fey

3. The Bitch in the House by Cathi Hanauer

4. Local Flavors: Cooking and Eating from America’s Farmer’s Markets by Deborah Madison

5. Amphigorey: Fifteen Books by Edward Gorey

Love. Edward. Gorey.

Do you still die for hardback books, or do you prefer the downloadable version? What’s on your must-own book list right now?

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(Re)Learning to Dream

5 Jan

Did you ever give up on a dream because life got in the way?

photo from thewonderforest.com

It seems like everyone is talking about dreaming lately. I suppose it’s fitting; we tend to examine our lives more closely every time January 1st comes around. From a talk I recently attended at my church on helping women to achieve their dreams, to several blogs on my blog roll, to talking with my best friend about whether we have the right dreams for our lives right now, having dreams is on the brain. The most common lament I hear, especially from other women, is that they don’t even know how to begin to figure out what their dream is. Either they don’t know how to look ahead, the future is too big with too many options, or they’re just not used to thinking about their own desires anymore.

I’ve had some amazing responses to my 30 before 30 list since I made it public. Friends have shared their own lists with me that they dreamed up a long time ago, others have started lists of their own. I’ve had more than a couple of my (crazy, loveable, absolutely fabulous) aunts ask me what I thought about them making a six before sixty list, or other some such integers, which I told them was an amazing idea! I never thought when I published my little list that I would get to hear all about others’ dreams, both the ones they look forward to and ones they’d given away. Which got me wondering: how do we keep dreaming when life keeps on coming?

When I starting writing down what I wanted to accomplish before I turned thirty, I surprised myself by thinking about all the things I’d ever wanted to do instead of shooting blindly into my future. For example:

When I was a kid, running down the street to ask the neighborhood kids “want to ride bikes?” was the highlight of my Summer’s day. I stopped riding sometime around junior high – I must have outgrown my bike or something – and haven’t been on one since. But I always looked wistfully at the kids cruising the strip down Huntington Beach while I was on vacation and envied the bike messengers streaming down the streets in SF when I lived in the city. So “Own and Ride a Bike With a Basket and a Bell” went on the list.

I love school, I’m good at school, I was happy when I was in school. I stopped going before I reached my personal academic goals, so ‘Go Back to School’ went on the list.

Since turning 21 I’ve been invited on approximately 50 wine tastings trips. Due to consistently poor timing I’ve been able to go on exactly none. I’ve dreamed of going wine tasting on a gorgeous Spring day, wearing a sundress and sandals, laughing with the man I love while sipping a wine that will remind us of this perfect day months later when we open a bottle to compliment the perfectly prepared meal I set on the table. So that went on the list as well.

Every time I tried to imagine what my life might look like years from now, and what sort of goals I’d have to set to get there, I got so hopelessly overwhelmed that my potential dreams quickly drowned in the sea of possibilities. The future is large and nebulous, but my past? My past is set. My past is a vast ocean of memories – times I was happy, times I was inspired, times where I felt like I was doing exactly the right thing for myself at the time. Our pasts are a veritable field of dreams, ripe for the harvest.

Jon Acuff wrote a brilliant post on what he calls ‘dreaming backwards’, and he had this to say on dreaming:

Instead of asking forward-facing questions like, “What do I want to do with my life?”, we dream backward and ask, “What have I done in my life that I’ve loved?” And the answer we get is not a bottomless, faceless list of options that could apply to anyone. It’s a personal, small, uniquely tailored to our hearts and our souls, handful of life experiences that made us feel alive.

It hurts my heart when I hear people say they don’t know how to dream anymore. So this is my antidote to being overwhelmed with possibility and not knowing where to start: start by thinking about times you were happy, when you were doing something you loved, when you felt needed. Think about what you might have done if no one ever said “you can’t.” Think about what you were working towards once upon a time, before life, finances, relationships, and busyness got in your way. Think about it, and then dream big. Because life’s too short to live it halfway.

What dream might you dare to revisit?

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2012 – The Year of Living Intentionally

4 Jan

 

photo from goawaycomeback on tumblr

in·ten·tion – noun
1. the act or instance of determining mentally upon some action or result.
2. the end or object intended; purpose

For the past two years my blogging friend, Katie of Cakes Tea and Dreams, has inspired me with the idea of holding on to one little word for a year. This is the first year my blog has been in a position where I can publicly give voice to mine. I’m not big on new year’s resolutions, as I prefer to set goals and dream big on my birthday. But I appreciate the simplicity of giving a name to a year, of distilling all your hopes and wishes for the following 366 days into one little word. So this year my one little word is “Intention.”

This word is actually a declaration of all that I wish I’d accomplished in 2011. As I may have mentioned before, 2011 was a year where A and I looking down on ourselves from above, seperate and circling our own lives in a holding pattern. We had great plans for moving forward, for working on our marriage, our finances, our faith walks, but due to setbacks, business, and basically getting hit from all sides we did nothing. Nada. But hey, 2011 could have seen us ending up in so much worse shape than just being in stasis; given the relational alternatives stress can have on a marriage, I’ll take maintaining any day. But this year will be different. I will be different. I won’t be stuck in a holding pattern, I will be intentional.

Here is what I intend to work towards:

  • Pursuing the Lord’s heart like I did when I first loved Him
  • Moving into a season of greater spiritual and emotional intimacy with my husband
  • Moving forward with the ministry God’s put in front of me
  • Making the most of the relationships I have, and taking time to nurture them
  • Tackling some of the harder things on The List, especially the ones that scare me
  • Having more people over for dinner, and not letting time/stress/money get in the way of my love of being a hostess
  • Finding ways beyond words to show people that I love them
  • Buying locally as much as possible
  • Finding fun, creative ways to get together with friends that don’t revolve around food
  • Reading challenging, empowering, quality books instead of solely feeding my brain a mental fast food diet of chick-lit
  • Putting my health first and making the time to exercise

That’s my word, that’s my plan, and hopefully that’s my 2012.

If you were to choose a word for 2012, what would it be? If you blog about it, drop me a line and let me know!

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Auf Wiedersehen, 2011, and Good Riddance!

3 Jan

Hello Everyone! Did you all have a nice holiday break? Lots of friends, family and downtime? I know I did!

Can I just say how glad I am 2011 is over? Usually I’m not big on the whole “new year, new beginnings!” thing (I save that sort of sparkly-fresh optimism for my birthday) but I really feel great about this year. If 2011 was the year of being stuck, 2012 will be the year of moving forward: in my life, in my goals, in my faith, in my marriage. I can feel it.

Already things are off to a great start. We spent New Years Eve solidifying new friendships and meeting new people – quite a departure from our usual routine of a low-key night with dear old friends or chaperoning the high school lock-in. New Years Day was spent lounging around, eating hors d’oeuvres that I did not cook and drinking endless mimosas with my hubby and a new very dear friend who has just come into our lives in this last year. A got a deal from one of our favorite B&B’s for sixty percent off their best room in January, so we’re going away before tax season starts instead of waiting until after. A’s been working near-tax season hours since last October, so this get away feels so necessary it’s not even funny. We are currently eating like paupers so we can live like kings while we’re away, and I cannot wait.

I don’t make New Year’s resolutions (again, something I save for my birthday), but I want to try and cross fifteen things off of The List this year. That’s more than half of what’s left to do, leaving me with ten things to cross off once I turn 29. Hey, I figure aim high, so that if I don’t meet my goal I’ll still be close to done. Plus, some of the things on The List (numbers 14 and 19, I’m looking at you) will greatly limit my free time and attention once they’re crossed off, and I don’t want them to get in the way of getting the rest of The List accomplished.

So I am looking forward to a pretty great new year, and I can’t wait to share it with you. So I wanna know: what are you looking forward to in 2012?

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